Sonic: Gotta go not that fast?

Before I show that I've grossly overestimated my writing ability, I played my first Sonic game. Sonic the Hedgehog 2! I hated it! It's hard to do my typical review, as it's a game from 1992 that isn't focused on story, but I'm doing it anyway.

Story: secondary. Playing the game reveals almost nothing about the story. There's no cutscene until the very end, but even that doesn't explain anything. As far as I could tell, a sentient hedgehog needs to stop an evil egg for some reason, probably explained in the manual. NA/10

Gameplay: the important bits. Despite being the entirety of the game, it's pretty flawed. The draw of Sonic is going fast, but you shouldn't go fast, or else you'll run into or off something and die. But there's a ten minute time limit... Other than dodging stage hazards, there's the occasional random mob to stop you from traversing. There are multiple ways to go throughout the zones, but all lead to a boss battle. These guys come in the range of annoying to pointless. Sonic only has one attack, so there's only one way to take down your opponents. And some of the paths to reach them are utterly nonsense or circular. Sonic doesn't gain anything new as we get close to the end. 2/10

Art: magical. There's something awe inspiring about the backgrounds of the zones. I could look at that city in the background for hours, even if I hated Toxic Plant Zone. Sonic never gets lost in the chaos of the levels, and you can tell Sega wanted their boy to rival Mario. 10/10

Sound: music's good. That's about all I can say about it. Because there's no story, we don't get a mix of emotions. There are only eleven zones, too, so there's not much to go around. But it's easy to get into what is here. I understand why Sonic has a large following on OverClocked Remix. 6/10

Technical: the worst part. I can overlook the laxness of a story or the disappointing gameplay, but the game needed more cooking. Hit detection is off. Smashing into enemies doesn't always go as you'd think, and it isn't consistent. Sometimes your opponent dies; sometimes it's you. It's frustrating and terrible. Platforms are somehow too sticky but made of ice at the same time. Once you're on one, build a house. But landing correctly on them can be an adventure. And Sonic himself always wants to drift. It's possible it's my garbage tier Rockcandy controller, but nothing's smooth in a game about speed. Good thing you're punished for going fast! 2/10

No bugs, but the controls are wonky (and deserve two negatives), as do the questionable game mechanics. -4

Final - 16/50

That's worse than I expected. I didn't enjoy Sonic 2, but I didn't expect it to be that bad. In terms of 90's platformers, I'll stick with Mario. The story exists, there are more gameplay functions, and it's more fun. At the very least, the biggest gimmick is functional. I enjoyed the music, though, and I may add artists to my list of possible real world mages.