Kirby Double Feature!

That's two Kirby references in the title in two days. A personal best?

One of my favorite characters in Smash Bros is Meta Knight. Sure, all I ever do is spin to win, but I have fun! But I've never played a Kirby game. They're not my jam, nor are they on the list, which shocked me. You'd think a franchise with 40 million sales figures would have a goat in it? But nope. They're all very mid, a fact I just learned. But I've decided now is the best time to take a detour, so let's play with a pink ball.

Meta Knight's first appearance is as a reoccurring mid boss for Dedede in Kirby's Adventure. It's on the original Gameboy, and I can't handle the presentation of that console anymore, but I have good news! Kirby's Dreamland was remastered for the GBA as Knightmare in Dreamland. So I booted that up and played it for a few hours. And I hated it. The controls were terrible, the levels were too samey, and the graphics looked like an early SNES game. The controls alone pushed me away, and I dropped it at forty percent. There's a guy on YouTube who beat it in an hour and a half without getting touched, so I just watched him finish it. It gets worse. And Meta Knight barely plays a part in it. He's not even named! There is a mode just for him, but I'm never gonna unlock it. Fortunately, this is not his only appearance.

In Super Kirby Star, there's an unlockable story mode where he is the main antagonist. You have to go through three other modes, but this game was a lot more fun. The controls work, the power ups are more fun, and the helpers make me think I have friends! Super Star is actually a good game! Revenge of Meta Knight has Kirby raiding the Halberd, MK's ship, to get to the armored foe. MK's underlings get a lot of screen time, and it's such a nice diversion. Meta Knight isn't truly evil, and he cares for his crew. But he doesn't like lazy people. It's pretty short, though, but I only raged at one level. An autoacroller with no power ups is dumb! It's not a long game, but it worked for me. I feel closer to one of my favorite Smash characters and can say I've played three Kirby games. They're not very great.

Knightmare in Dreamland gets a 21/50 on the backs of terrible controls. The limited attacks of power ups makes the game boring and annoying, and the graphics are outdated.
Super Star is a solid 33/50. The controls work, and each power up is a massive change of pace. But the music is pretty bland, and everything about it is a Mario Party game without the board, friendship, and memories made.
The remaster of Dream Land, Spring Breeze, is too snipped (I assume), so I won't grade it. It seemed playable, though.

I see the appeal to these Kirby games, but they're not world changers. There's nothing they do that's amazing, even if Kirby's Copy Ability can lead to some fun. But it's a very straightforward franchise with nothing else to do. Mario is a better platformer, run-and-gun games are more exciting, and so many others have better characters and stories. Kirby isn't deep or wide, but he's worth 4.3 billion USD, according to a totally legitimate website, so who won this round? Time to retreat to Advance Wars (I mean it this time).